We want it in our personal lives and we want it for our businesses. Why? Well, it means that our customers value us and will come back to us again and again for what they need. It also means that they will tell others about us, which makes our businesses grow. We all get what we want! Everyone is happy! Life is beautiful!

Sounds great doesn't it? It is, but there's a catch. The catch is, how! How do we gain such fierce commitment? There are a number of ways. A few follow:

• Having a unique product or service
  
• Building rapport
  
• Offering great prices
  
• Building rapport
  
• Excelling at customer service
  
• Building rapport

And the greatest of these is building rapport! Why? Well, because building rapport is the cornerstone of establishing relationships with others. It is what clinches their commitment to us. A client or customer may do business with us once or twice but if we don't develop a rapport with them, we won't establish a lasting relationship with them and hence we should not expect to earn their commitment.

So, you must be wondering, how do we build rapport with our clients or customers in order to gain their commitment? There are a number of ways. The three most powerful follow.

1. Words - we are most comfortable with people who use the same "categories" of words that we do. So, to build rapport with others, we must use the same categories of words that they use.

   There are three main categories of words. They are:

   
   
   • visual (words that have to do with seeing or looking),
     
   • auditory (words that have to do with listening or hearing), and
     
   • kinesthetic (words that have to do with feelings or touching).
   
   A person might use one category exclusively, or any combination of all three. We must be capable of using all of the above categories in order to build rapport with others using words.
   
   
2. Body language - we reflect back or "mirror" another person's body language in order to be more like them, which in turn helps them to feel more comfortable with us. We can mirror the stance or posture, breathing, voice (tone, tempo, volume), and movements of others in order to build rapport with them.
   
   
3. Thinking Styles - we all have certain patterns or styles of thinking which were shaped by the events and people that impacted our lives. (These patterns of thinking are important because we use them to make decisions about things.)

   Clues to our thinking styles are revealed through communication. So, in order to build rapport with others, we must adapt our communication to reflect their thinking styles.

We must take every opportunity to build rapport with our customers and clients by using words, body language and thinking styles. This will help us to establish lasting relationships with them and they will repay us through their commitment to us.

Elena Turner, a former medical technologist/microbiologist, is a Master Practitioner of NLP involved in business consulting. Elena's company, called Beyond Wordz, specializes in advanced business communication techniques centering around Building Rapport (the cornerstone of building relationships). Elena can be reached by any of the following methods: Beyond Wordz 1063 King Street West, Suite 139 Hamilton, Ontario L8S 4S3 Phone: 905-547-6393 Fax: 905-547-8864 Email: beyondwordz AT on.aibn.com Website: www.beyondwordz.com